Cathy's Version
I'm sure Preston will have a very different version of our story so I will share mine ( first- LOL)
The word 'turbulent', would be an understatement to describe our relationship. Yet from day one, we ( I) knew that there was something undenaible about our union despite all the ups and downs.
Our on-line communication was amazing. We both shared a passion for writing, for personal development, for family, God and simplicity. We both seemed to be on the same page and traveling on similar paths. We both shared our visions for the future which were right on point.
Unfortunatley, our first date was horrible. Pres. was so distracted and he did not ever make eye contact with me during our quick lunch in the Eaton Centre. Come to think about it I don't think he even paid for my meal. I remember walking away thinking that I would never see this guy again but as fate would have it, we ended up communicating despite that poor first impression.
Our love for self-development however kept our relationship going. We both signed up for a 100 day challenge in September of 2009 and became each other's accountability partner which meant that we had a front seat into what was happening in each other's lives. We shared our challenges, our goals, our dreams, our passions and our frustrations. We were in contact with each other almost every day for those 100 days.
Remembering back, I think it was our goals that kept us united. I could not deny that we both wanted the exact same things out of life: to be led by God in everything we did; to impact other people's lives; to love passionately and have great relationships with our family and friends and to be financially free.
As time progressed, our challenges developed mainly because Pres. just did not fit the 'picture' of what I thought my 'knight in shining armour' should look like. I thought I needed a strong dominant personality and Pres. was quietly confident and did not really assert himself (or so I thought) . As it turned out, God knew exactly what I needed and gradually changed my heart towards him. It was a long process frought with many break ups, counseling sessions, a weekend healing retreat and many, many sessions with my mentor. Truth is, I had to work on ME. And once I did that, the issues that I had with Pres. became non-issues. I realize that I'm still a work in progress but I can't image going through the journey with anyone else but him.
A few years ago, a pastor at my church said that 'God is looking for conduits to manifest His love in tangible ways' ( paraphrase). That's what I found in Preston, a tangible expression of God's love for me and for this I will be forever grateful!
To say that his proposal was a surprise would be an understatement. As Preston shared, we were both working out our own 'issues' when he proposed but he had started to win my heart long before the proposal. For almost 30 days prior to his proposal, he sent me a detailed email everyday just sharing with me how God was working in his life and developing him. He never missed a day and I looked forward to reading about his transformation each day. He shared how God was giving him more boldness, more confidence and more favour. Doors ( and parking spots-lol) were beginning to open up for Him and he was so humbled by all the changes happening in his life.
Under the counsel of one of my mentors. I was also advised to tell him what Ihe needed to do to win my heart. I remember giving him a list ( that in my mind was impossible to fulfil) and telling him that if he completed the list by December 2011 then he would have my heart. In the past, I never believed that I even had a right to set high expectations for myself yet God was faithful. I don't want to share all of our business but one of the important things on the list was that he clear off his debt load. At this present moment, Preston is debt free with money in the bank to boot! He completed everything on the list and more !!!! My girlfriend shared with me that Preston has a "ministry of consistency." Amen to that !
Preston's Version (The real one)
From the initial contact there was something special about our connection. After chatting online we discovered we were so in-sync in so many areas of life that we both joined an online '100 Day Challenge' to better ourselves and became very excited to meet in person.
We arranged a mid-week, lunch time get-together, which meant we were both coming from work. That is to say, I arrived prim and proper from the office and she showed up in sweaty gym-wear with no make-up and having done nothing with her hair. She was taller than I expected (or perhaps I was shorter...) and at that time, more muscular than I was. I remember my first impression being a flat 'No.'
All that chemistry online and on the phone vanished and we went through the motions but for me, it was over before it began. For the record, I always bought lunch on such occasions - if this was an exception as asserted, I can neither confirm nor deny (it was two+ years ago).
However, doing the '100 Day Challenge' together kept us intrigued by each other as we continued to share so many goals and passions in our lives. So, we ended up on a second date - at the gym. My impression of her, (and presumably vice-versa) greatly improved and we continued to hang out (and I joined a gym) but we never got serious.
It was an odd relationship to be sure. We both saw the potential. Both felt deprived of what we thought we wanted out of a partner. Both kept hoping it would blossom into something more but neither was really willing to jump in with both feet.
Despite having an uncanny sense of certainty that Cathy was 'the one' I just couldn't see it and we parted for a while, only to end up working together on a joint project which led us back together. Now things were getting serious but still, while we each felt a mutual attraction to the other, we also continued to feel the other lacked those qualities we were looking for. I wasn't the dominate male nor was she the attentive, affectionate female.
What became clear to me, is in having had attentive, affectionate women before, was that was what made me comfortable, but it didn't make me grow. One of the core values Cathy and I share, is a strong desire for personal growth and in Cathy I had someone who not only made me want to be a better person but also someone who would grow right alongside of me. However, Cathy didn't see it that way.
There were many times when one or the other (usually her) would call it quits, not seeing what we were looking for. Each time I'd go to God and every single time, He directed me right back. Nevermind if she wasn't giving me all the attention and affection I craved, nevermind she didn't think I was right, 'Just love her' God said. So I did. "Your like a cockroach," she once observed, "No matter how many times I try to get rid of you, you keep coming back." But it was said with a smile, as it was a steadfast love she'd never known before.
I long knew I'd marry her (told her so many times - but she never believed me) but I never acted on it because I never felt that sense of 'I couldn't live without' passion. At this point my life was stagnant, and had been for years despite spending thousands on self-development. Fed up with the status quo, and of trying to fix myself, I turned to God to do for me what I could not do for myself.
It was as if God just threw up his hands and said 'About time!' and then got to serious work. He seperated Cathy and I (she was all to glad to oblige), and I from all other 'distractions' (my blog, my writing, my side business, my coach, etc.) and got me to just focus on Him. In one month He transformed me more than my personal Life Coach did in a year (my Life Coach is still awesome, but can't compare to my Lord). It was amazing but there was a hitch. If I 'knew' Cathy was 'the one' and that 'I'd marry her' then He wanted me to honour her and Him. Did I trust Him or not? She wasn't even talking to me at the time, but I did trust God. So I arranged a meeting with Cathy.
Little did I know God had transformed her too. She came ready to start fresh, to begin anew, and to really accept and give love freely. She was ready to give up the comfortable discomfort of the dominate male, who had never honoured her, and embrace the steady love of someone who did. That was awesome. I trumped her with a ring.
I'm sure Preston will have a very different version of our story so I will share mine ( first- LOL)
The word 'turbulent', would be an understatement to describe our relationship. Yet from day one, we ( I) knew that there was something undenaible about our union despite all the ups and downs.
Our on-line communication was amazing. We both shared a passion for writing, for personal development, for family, God and simplicity. We both seemed to be on the same page and traveling on similar paths. We both shared our visions for the future which were right on point.
Unfortunatley, our first date was horrible. Pres. was so distracted and he did not ever make eye contact with me during our quick lunch in the Eaton Centre. Come to think about it I don't think he even paid for my meal. I remember walking away thinking that I would never see this guy again but as fate would have it, we ended up communicating despite that poor first impression.
Our love for self-development however kept our relationship going. We both signed up for a 100 day challenge in September of 2009 and became each other's accountability partner which meant that we had a front seat into what was happening in each other's lives. We shared our challenges, our goals, our dreams, our passions and our frustrations. We were in contact with each other almost every day for those 100 days.
Remembering back, I think it was our goals that kept us united. I could not deny that we both wanted the exact same things out of life: to be led by God in everything we did; to impact other people's lives; to love passionately and have great relationships with our family and friends and to be financially free.
As time progressed, our challenges developed mainly because Pres. just did not fit the 'picture' of what I thought my 'knight in shining armour' should look like. I thought I needed a strong dominant personality and Pres. was quietly confident and did not really assert himself (or so I thought) . As it turned out, God knew exactly what I needed and gradually changed my heart towards him. It was a long process frought with many break ups, counseling sessions, a weekend healing retreat and many, many sessions with my mentor. Truth is, I had to work on ME. And once I did that, the issues that I had with Pres. became non-issues. I realize that I'm still a work in progress but I can't image going through the journey with anyone else but him.
A few years ago, a pastor at my church said that 'God is looking for conduits to manifest His love in tangible ways' ( paraphrase). That's what I found in Preston, a tangible expression of God's love for me and for this I will be forever grateful!
To say that his proposal was a surprise would be an understatement. As Preston shared, we were both working out our own 'issues' when he proposed but he had started to win my heart long before the proposal. For almost 30 days prior to his proposal, he sent me a detailed email everyday just sharing with me how God was working in his life and developing him. He never missed a day and I looked forward to reading about his transformation each day. He shared how God was giving him more boldness, more confidence and more favour. Doors ( and parking spots-lol) were beginning to open up for Him and he was so humbled by all the changes happening in his life.
Under the counsel of one of my mentors. I was also advised to tell him what Ihe needed to do to win my heart. I remember giving him a list ( that in my mind was impossible to fulfil) and telling him that if he completed the list by December 2011 then he would have my heart. In the past, I never believed that I even had a right to set high expectations for myself yet God was faithful. I don't want to share all of our business but one of the important things on the list was that he clear off his debt load. At this present moment, Preston is debt free with money in the bank to boot! He completed everything on the list and more !!!! My girlfriend shared with me that Preston has a "ministry of consistency." Amen to that !
Preston's Version (The real one)
From the initial contact there was something special about our connection. After chatting online we discovered we were so in-sync in so many areas of life that we both joined an online '100 Day Challenge' to better ourselves and became very excited to meet in person.
We arranged a mid-week, lunch time get-together, which meant we were both coming from work. That is to say, I arrived prim and proper from the office and she showed up in sweaty gym-wear with no make-up and having done nothing with her hair. She was taller than I expected (or perhaps I was shorter...) and at that time, more muscular than I was. I remember my first impression being a flat 'No.'
All that chemistry online and on the phone vanished and we went through the motions but for me, it was over before it began. For the record, I always bought lunch on such occasions - if this was an exception as asserted, I can neither confirm nor deny (it was two+ years ago).
However, doing the '100 Day Challenge' together kept us intrigued by each other as we continued to share so many goals and passions in our lives. So, we ended up on a second date - at the gym. My impression of her, (and presumably vice-versa) greatly improved and we continued to hang out (and I joined a gym) but we never got serious.
It was an odd relationship to be sure. We both saw the potential. Both felt deprived of what we thought we wanted out of a partner. Both kept hoping it would blossom into something more but neither was really willing to jump in with both feet.
Despite having an uncanny sense of certainty that Cathy was 'the one' I just couldn't see it and we parted for a while, only to end up working together on a joint project which led us back together. Now things were getting serious but still, while we each felt a mutual attraction to the other, we also continued to feel the other lacked those qualities we were looking for. I wasn't the dominate male nor was she the attentive, affectionate female.
What became clear to me, is in having had attentive, affectionate women before, was that was what made me comfortable, but it didn't make me grow. One of the core values Cathy and I share, is a strong desire for personal growth and in Cathy I had someone who not only made me want to be a better person but also someone who would grow right alongside of me. However, Cathy didn't see it that way.
There were many times when one or the other (usually her) would call it quits, not seeing what we were looking for. Each time I'd go to God and every single time, He directed me right back. Nevermind if she wasn't giving me all the attention and affection I craved, nevermind she didn't think I was right, 'Just love her' God said. So I did. "Your like a cockroach," she once observed, "No matter how many times I try to get rid of you, you keep coming back." But it was said with a smile, as it was a steadfast love she'd never known before.
I long knew I'd marry her (told her so many times - but she never believed me) but I never acted on it because I never felt that sense of 'I couldn't live without' passion. At this point my life was stagnant, and had been for years despite spending thousands on self-development. Fed up with the status quo, and of trying to fix myself, I turned to God to do for me what I could not do for myself.
It was as if God just threw up his hands and said 'About time!' and then got to serious work. He seperated Cathy and I (she was all to glad to oblige), and I from all other 'distractions' (my blog, my writing, my side business, my coach, etc.) and got me to just focus on Him. In one month He transformed me more than my personal Life Coach did in a year (my Life Coach is still awesome, but can't compare to my Lord). It was amazing but there was a hitch. If I 'knew' Cathy was 'the one' and that 'I'd marry her' then He wanted me to honour her and Him. Did I trust Him or not? She wasn't even talking to me at the time, but I did trust God. So I arranged a meeting with Cathy.
Little did I know God had transformed her too. She came ready to start fresh, to begin anew, and to really accept and give love freely. She was ready to give up the comfortable discomfort of the dominate male, who had never honoured her, and embrace the steady love of someone who did. That was awesome. I trumped her with a ring.
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