Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Reposts of Wedding Blog - Preston's Nov 20th Post

So I'm back from my weekend away - somewhat ironically, at Singing Waters - deepening my Christian walk.
This is important to me as Cathy, as a strong woman of God, will be looking to me, as her husband, to provide a strong God-centred foundation for our joined families. Beyond that, the more I learn to depend on Him, the better my life gets.
Without going into detail, I certainly found it an enlightening weekend. Releasing some of the old resentments of the past, and more importantly, shifting my focus from knowing God in my head to knowing Him in my heart.
Speaking of heart, I shutter to think of the long distance charges my longing heart racked up talking to Cathy over this weekend.
Reading Cathy's blog entries, she's shares her anxiety over sharing her space. For myself, I don't mind sharing my space so much, it's more the loss of my time 'freedom' that makes me anxious. Being able to do whatever, whenever, however I want without having to consider anyone else. Be that writing, blogging, going out with my friends or just goofing off playing video games. It's not a freedom I've been able to enjoy very long, having been married at a very young age and a single parent up until recently. So to forsake that freedom again, so soon after finally regaining it, stings.
To be honest, it's not like I've used that freedom very productively and knowing myself, I've always been more motivated to do something for someone else's benefit than I am for my own benefit. So in the long run, it's just as well, I'm sure I'll be better off in more ways than I can count.
Of course, the added benefit of having someone(s) precious to spend all that time with is the most wonderful gift of all.

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