One of the most discouraging things anyone faces as they try to elevate themselves to a new level of being is the 'wisdom' of friends and family who think you should 'get real' and 'stop dreaming'.
Surprisingly the further down the ladder you are, the worse it is. I've found that people simply don't want to see you succeed, because if you do, then it's going to force them to have to reevaluate their own lives. Possibly have to make some hard decisions and make some changes. IE: It makes them uncomfortable.
They are locked into their limited mindsets and would rather sit there in that (dis)comfort zone - the pain they know - rather than try something different. They are afraid of failure (and/or success) and don't want you bursting their bubble.
This is nothing new and I've blogged about it in thecuphalffull.com. It can be difficult for people to deal with because you need to either develop a thick skin or find new friends who are more supportive or open-minded.
What is even more difficult is when those that do support you, leave, suggesting you don't have what it takes. Particularly if it's a spouse or loved one. That can really be a huge blow to your ego and confidence.
I suggest you do two things: 1) Listen and learn - Odds are they have some solid justification for they way they feel. You probably can't see what they see, which is all the more reason to use this time to really listen to what they are saying, perhaps between the lines and reflect on yourself.
They have a different prespective of you than you do and likely see things in you that you cannot see for yourself. It's like having a mole on the back of your neck. Without a mirror you cannot see it for what it is but everyone else can.
2) Keep on going anyway! Okay, you have issues. Maybe you have some hang-ups you're still trying to get over or habits that need addressing or skeleton's in your closet. Welcome to life. Everyone does. So what? Do you think world leaders don't have some issues? Or CEOs? Of course they do.
I'm not suggesting you ignore yours. Listen, learn and do something about those things that hinder you. I am suggesting you don't let the fact that you are not currently perfect (and guess what? Never will be...) stop your momentum. No one is perfect. Those people who lost faith in you aren't perfect either. Perhaps they have it together more in some area of their life, but inevitably you have it together more in others. Quite likely the real reason they left is because you're not up to carrying their baggage. Awww... Too bad. Let them carry their own baggage themselves - builds character. Regardless of what the situation may be, it's no excuse to stop.
You might want to solicite some second (and third, forth, fifth) opinions. Were they right? Do other people see the same faults? Feedback is a wonderful thing. It enables you to identify areas of development that you might not have otherwise seen. Conversely, it also softens the blow if someone is over-reacting to something you've done. Either way you gain a better perspective of where you are and where you need to be.
Surprisingly the further down the ladder you are, the worse it is. I've found that people simply don't want to see you succeed, because if you do, then it's going to force them to have to reevaluate their own lives. Possibly have to make some hard decisions and make some changes. IE: It makes them uncomfortable.
They are locked into their limited mindsets and would rather sit there in that (dis)comfort zone - the pain they know - rather than try something different. They are afraid of failure (and/or success) and don't want you bursting their bubble.
This is nothing new and I've blogged about it in thecuphalffull.com. It can be difficult for people to deal with because you need to either develop a thick skin or find new friends who are more supportive or open-minded.
What is even more difficult is when those that do support you, leave, suggesting you don't have what it takes. Particularly if it's a spouse or loved one. That can really be a huge blow to your ego and confidence.
I suggest you do two things: 1) Listen and learn - Odds are they have some solid justification for they way they feel. You probably can't see what they see, which is all the more reason to use this time to really listen to what they are saying, perhaps between the lines and reflect on yourself.
They have a different prespective of you than you do and likely see things in you that you cannot see for yourself. It's like having a mole on the back of your neck. Without a mirror you cannot see it for what it is but everyone else can.
2) Keep on going anyway! Okay, you have issues. Maybe you have some hang-ups you're still trying to get over or habits that need addressing or skeleton's in your closet. Welcome to life. Everyone does. So what? Do you think world leaders don't have some issues? Or CEOs? Of course they do.
I'm not suggesting you ignore yours. Listen, learn and do something about those things that hinder you. I am suggesting you don't let the fact that you are not currently perfect (and guess what? Never will be...) stop your momentum. No one is perfect. Those people who lost faith in you aren't perfect either. Perhaps they have it together more in some area of their life, but inevitably you have it together more in others. Quite likely the real reason they left is because you're not up to carrying their baggage. Awww... Too bad. Let them carry their own baggage themselves - builds character. Regardless of what the situation may be, it's no excuse to stop.
You might want to solicite some second (and third, forth, fifth) opinions. Were they right? Do other people see the same faults? Feedback is a wonderful thing. It enables you to identify areas of development that you might not have otherwise seen. Conversely, it also softens the blow if someone is over-reacting to something you've done. Either way you gain a better perspective of where you are and where you need to be.
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