Alone

It's ironic.

The epiphany I've had has so dramatically changed my life and in some pretty ironic ways.

I've gone from being totally emotionally independent to feeling lost without someone to relate too. I've never been in this spot before in my adult life and simply don't know what to do with myself.

Before my lovers would often want to talk about top plate issues all night long and I would grumpily want my sleep by midnight. Now I find myself unable to sleep without having had that emotional closure of nightly discussion.

Previously I used to be able to aptly distract or busy myself when alone but now I'm simply dying to talk to someone, my girlfriend preferably but she's busy, a friend perhaps or even just a complete stranger would be an emotional relief to me at the moment. This is a strange, uncomfortable feeling for me and I can't help but wonder if I haven't swung too far into emotional dependency. Or perhaps this is a normal state to have, it's just new and uncomfortable to me.

In the past video games have been great past time but now I not that interested in them unless I have someone to play them with. Arrrgh. I feel like my whole life has been upended.